It's a dirty free for all.

Thank you for the comments! I love you guys. Such amazing people you all are! I imagine you mean alot to those around you... (not just me :) )

I love hotels. I remember getting home from the party at about 5 or so the other night, and went for a walk along the corridors of the hotel as my friends were passing out left right and centre in our room. It was fun getting lost by myself in my numbed state, staring at the city lights out the window, walking past room after room of people tucked up in bed. It was so quiet. And so peaceful.


Today has been a good day for intake. I tentatively decided to fast but it didn't really work out- dinner with fam etc etc. So I decided with the anorexic part of my brain and went for something low calorie rather then the bulimic part of the brain which would say "Go on, eat pad thai, and 4 helpings of dessert in like ten minutes- you can just vomit it all up". Lol I'm serious that's how I always think. Anyway I decided on sushi. So I go to this quaint little japanese place up the road (side note: was served by this gorgeous petite japanese goddess- immediate thinspo) which I have never been to before. I order this 5 pack of spicy tuna pieces. In an effort to look experienced/comfortable with japanese cuisine (I only ever get the pre-made rolls at uni) I order this pretty much to avoid saying words such as "inari", "Futomaki", "Maguro" etc. LOL

Anyway I get it home start to eat it, and realise it's the raw tuna, which I hate. GAHHH I asked for the wrong thing. So I ate two pieces and palmed the rest of it onto my mum who was already eating pad thai. So according to calorieking.com they are 30 calories a piece. WIN. Defs getting the cooked tuna next time.

So that puts me at 60 calories today.

Probably going to be a Nanna and go to bed soon- it's 9.15. Who am I????!?!?!? LOL. But to be honest I have had a tiring day: dancing, and alot of physically/emotionally draining acting rehearsals. I am spent. Plus saving myself for the 'Ke$ha' style state I will probs get myself into tomorrow night HA. Especially with "a water bottle full of whisky in my hand bag" lol. Oh Kesh. lyrical genius. HA.



I also have to vote tomorrow- first election. Have tried to be a responsible Australian citizen and research each political party. :)

Have a good weekend my friends.

xoxox

food boys food boys food boys.

I had a tough day today.. talked to the ex about getting my stuff back. Meeting up on sat night before I go out which means will be *fingers crossed* looking some what impressive lol. It was just hard because it was the first time that we actually talked about the night we broke up. He expressed that he felt bad after what happened- story is- we broke up outside my house at about ten at night, he was crying, i was crying, and he got in his car to drive off as he saw me walk in the opposite direction (not to my house). I ended up roaming the streets crying for a few hours ha. I of course was pissed he didn't follow me, but i mean I knew he wouldn't. Anyway he tells me he has become reclusive since breaking up and hasn't been going out or anything just working. I've been doing the opposite: off the rails. weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. lol.

I guess just talking to him again makes me miss him, plus the fact that we are giving everything back finally gives us no other reason to need to see each other. So it's just slightly frightening and new to me.

Hopefully I'll meet some nice fellas on the weekend ;)

ENOUGH OF BOY RANTING............

I read Wintergirls for the first time a few days back. I enjoyed it. I probably related to Wasted a bit more but. Lia's inner battle was definitely something that I identified with.

"My traitor fingers want that fudge. No, they don’t. They want a seven layer bar and some of those weird muffins and those pretzels. No, they do not. They want to squish the marshmallows and stuff them into my mouth. They will not."

Just having those moments where you are so torn between stuffing your face; and, killing yourself because you are simply thinking of stuffing your face.

Anyways my intake has been good lately.
Today I binged and purged on pancakes in the morning. ooops. (thank god my sore throat is going)
And I have eaten one sushi roll.

Going out for dinner tomorrow (italian), really really want to avoid purging for just one day if I can. Will try and order something light.

xxx