Wednesday, July 28, 2010

scared..

just had one of the worst grey outs i've had in ages. I'm pretty much used to it cos I'm anaemic...but still scary...purging is getting worse...
sitting on the couch sipping vegetable soup. So dehydrated..need need need to keep this soup down, it was the reason I purged before in the first place. I'm back to not even keeping vegetables down.
Sometimes i manage to laugh at myself at how fucked up I am, I can even have a little chuckle on the way to the toilet, "Here we go again, ha ha ha." But I am not taking care of myself at all. This week has been worse then ever with the break up. Knew I'd fall to pieces.

Sex and the City is on tv. making me more depressed.

I wish I could just take a day off.... from everything...

In other news.. Saw Inception.
Blew my fucking mind.
dream within dreams within another dream gahhhh

5 comments:

  1. Yeah, I'm watching Sex and the City right now as well. xD It's so great at reminding us of bad relationship times. :/

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  2. I know those feelings of laughing at how fucked up you are. I do it all the time I'd binge and then look at all the shit I ate and be like "really? hahaha really? frosting and pretzels? wow! haha"
    I'm pathetic and it's nearly humorous.
    Careful with the black outs dear! I had one this morning :/

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  3. in my forgotten place i need to wait for "inception" 7 days..:( want to see it on big screen..cant wait...i want that day off too :(

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  4. Drink some gatorade. you need the electrolytes if you are purging a lot. That imbalance is probably what is causing you to feel so out of control and crappy.

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  5. nothing like a romantic comedy to remind you that you are single! sigh.
    haha it's always the 'really?????' moment.... as in you just binged on cooking chocolate, pita bread, cheese (always the weirdest combos haha)
    I usually have gatorade ready on hand but I used it up already.. not good!!

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